im in love

yes.u read the title.im in luv.least,dats wut i think for now.but dis love is different.i am,in love,with a guy,that does not treat me ryte.i dont know why.but i cant seem to let him go.y do i say he aint treatin me ryte?cuz he aint treatin me like a girl/lady.i feel awfully cheap wif him.he controls me,n i dont mind it.actually i DO mind.but,i'd do anythg for him to be with me.and so,im under his shadow.dats not how a relationship should feel lyk.i mean,yeah, he says he luvs me soo much.but smtimes it feels lyk im d only one putting in effort in our relationship.no giv and take.n last nyte,he told me,the story of 'another girl'.yeah,my heart was crushed,lyk the dummies in a crash-test operation.

so,the thing is, this guy,treats me wrong,has lots of flaws dat can b my reasons to reject him,n he was talking bout 'another girl'.and i,wut am i doin?im closin my eyes,pushing it all away,forgettin all d bad things he said,and im givin my love,freely,back to him.in fact,followin his evry orders to keep him wif me.lyk,WTF?WTF?WTF?.y cant i just let him go for gods sake!he aint d ryte one for me!!!!!but i cant let him go!this is so weird.i have never,EVER been this cheap with any guys before,but wif him;im as cheap as d last-years's stock sale.its so unlike me.

i consulted my friends.and they said he's just a playboy.askin me to get rid of him.but again,i refuse to.i nod and accept their words,but im not takin the action.its so freakin retard!how do i know if a guy is a playboy or not?and oh,did i mention,dis is a L.D.R?no,dats not an acronym for light dependent resistor.its Long Distance Relationship.so as u can see, d more im writing,d more exposed the reasons of why i should leave him.

its hard.bcuz,my luv dun come easily.and somehow,cupid struck us.dis guy has hurt and torn my heart more than he makes it flutter.yet,im still crazy for him.im wacko enough to forgive him.

last nyte,there wus 11 missd calls.all his.i only pickd up the 12th and that was the worst convsation with him evr.im fragile,i admit that.and how do u suppose i feel,when he told me about the other girl?n after tellin me abt her,he says how much he's in love with me.how i have changed him.yeah,i know,dats all d typical playboy lines.but,yeah,im swallowin it,every single letter.gulping i down,even when i can sense dat its all just lines he might have used before.huh.and i ask myself,why do i love him?
mayb its cuz,deep down,i can feel that he's being honest.smthgs telling me that he is honest abt how he feels.he says he'll still love me the same way,even if he has a new gurl.
i want him to love me.but i dont want to ruin d gurls feelings.i'd rather fly off to antartica,knowing that im the reason his new gurl is sad.
love,love,love,love,love,love.
L.O.V.E
its so deep,n faint all at d same time.